I OFTEN LOVINGLY refer to my children as peas. To which my daughter refers to me as a pod. Why? Because I protect my peas.
As parents, we all strive to protect our children.
It starts even before the birth of the child. We ask how to protect the unborn baby in the womb. What should the mother eat? What should she do or stay away from? If she is vomiting during pregnancy, will it harm the baby? Is there anything that can be done to avoid a miscarriage?
At birth, what is the safest way to deliver?
After birth, we protect them from the physical factors. From hunger and thirst. From cold and heat. From infection and trauma. From poverty.
We protect them from psychological harm too. From fear and failure. From abuse and bullying. From all the insecurities that can plague the mind. We build resilience.
However, for the Believer there is an added, more important, aspect. Allah ﷻ says:
يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ قُوٓا۟ أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا وَقُودُهَا ٱلنَّاسُ وَٱلْحِجَارَةُ عَلَيْهَا مَلَـٰٓئِكَةٌ غِلَاظٌ شِدَادٌ لَّا يَعْصُونَ ٱللَّهَ مَآ أَمَرَهُمْ وَيَفْعَلُونَ مَا يُؤْمَرُونَ
‘O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones; over it are angels stern and strong, they do not disobey Allah in what He commands them and do as they are commanded.’ (at Tahrim 6)
It is easy to forget in this materialistic world that our role as parents is beyond the mere physical and psychological. It is beyond the confines of this dunya. It is for the eternity of the akhirah.
That single view changes everything.
For then, the focus becomes what will protect us from that Fire? The decisions that we then make are motivated by all that which pleases Allah ﷻ and avoiding all that which displeases Him.
So, first and foremost we need to know our deen ourselves. How can we give to our children what we do not have? It requires us to be examples of that deen. How can we ask them to do what we do not do ourselves?
Furthermore, relief from that Fire in the next life will invariably mean some hardship and sacrifice in this life. But we accept that hardship as a small price for what is to come.
وَمَنْ أَرَادَ ٱلْـَٔاخِرَةَ وَسَعَىٰ لَهَا سَعْيَهَا وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ فَأُو۟لَـٰٓئِكَ كَانَ سَعْيُهُم مَّشْكُورًا
‘And whoever desires the Hereafter and strives for it, with the necessary effort due for it while he is a believer – then such are the ones whose striving shall be appreciated, (thanked and rewarded by Allah).’ (al Israa 19)
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