MY SON, LIKE many young boys his age, has a thing about cars, especially the fast and expensive type. I tend to downplay this as much as possible as I do not want him to have excessive love for the things of the dunya. It’s from early childhood that the likes and dislikes, the inclinations are built. So it is vital that we nurture the right inclinations from an early age.
This is particularly true as we live in a materialistic world, and for those who live in the Western lands or the Middle East, the riches of the world can bedazzle the eyes. It is as the Prophet ﷺ said: ‘Verily, every nation has a fitna/trial and the trial of my nation is wealth.’ (al-Tirmidhi)
It is important to temper the material with a reminder of that which is better.
Take the example of the Prophet ﷺ when he found the sahaba admiring a silk cloak that had been presented to him. He said: “Do you admire the softness of this (cloth)? The handkerchiefs of Sa’ad ibn Muadh in Paradise are better than this.” (Muslim)
He ﷺ didn’t stop the sahaba from admiring it and he also did not encourage it. Rather he put the luxuries of this world in their place compared to the eternal luxuries of the akhirah- the best of this dunya doesn’t come close to even the most trivial thing in the akhirah.
He also directed them in the same instance to a good role model for them to follow. The outstanding sahaba Sa’ad ibn Muadh (ra) who was one of the leaders of the Madinans. When he accepted Islam, he brought his entire tribe to Islam, such was his influence. His tribe- the Aus- were one of the two key factions of the Ansar who supported the Prophet ﷺ throughout his mission in Madinah. The Prophet ﷺ said about Sa’ad on his death: ‘This (i.e. Sa’ad ibn Muadh) is the one at whose death the Throne shook, the gates of heaven were opened for him and seventy thousand angels attended his funeral. It (i.e. his grave) squeezed him once then released him.’ (Nasa’i)
A beautiful lesson for parents to take. The Prophet ﷺ was always vigilant over the sahabah. So be wary of the little things that can distract the soul. Put the things of the dunya in their right place- nothing more than a cheap imitation of what is to come. Make your children yearn for that which is more beautiful and more lasting in the akhirah. Draw their attention away from the ‘role models’ of this dunya with all their material things to the role models of Islam- the Prophets, those who stood with them and those who follow in their footsteps.
Some would ask if it is wrong to have the fine things of this world if attained by halal means? The scholars, past and present, have spoken about this extensively. Much can be said but a simple hadith of the Prophet ﷺ perhaps points to the state of the nafs that we are trying to attain. He ﷺ said: ‘Perish the slave of Dinar, Dirham, Qatifa (thick soft cloth), and Khamisa (a garment), for if he is given, he is pleased; otherwise he is dissatisfied.’ (Bukhari)
So, the question to ask is, am I just as pleased when I don’t have something as when I have it?
Related Articles
Spoken about but not spoken to
ISN’T IT STRANGE that the more free a society claims it is, the more closed it tends to be! Take an incident that my wife recalls. She had started a postgraduate teacher training course and her first placement was at a large primary school in a rural area just outside of London. Here the population […]
To lose a child
I NEVER CEASE to be amazed by the power of our iman. Of how it gives light in the darkest moments, and strength in our moments of weakness. I wrote the following three years ago in light of a family loss. But the same can be applied today at what we are witnessing in Palestine. The same […]
Breakfast together
MY DAUGHTER, MAY Allah bless her, remains observant of those around her. She could see the great anguish that we are going through with what is happening in Palestine over the last month. So to lighten our mood she decided to make the whole family breakfast one morning. She was earnest about it and started […]
