STATE SCHOOLS ARE different from private schools. Take Sports Day.
I recall at my daughter’s previous state school Sports Day, I was surprised to find that the children no longer competed against each other. Each child participated in set activities. Each child received the same ‘Participated in Sports day’ certificate at the end of the day. No child lost because there was never a race. Why? Because it’s all about participating and losing can be a traumatic experience for a child.
Contrast that with a private school where my other half is a teacher. Here highly competitive girls raced spurred on by even more competitive, highflying parents. Gold, silver and bronze medals awaited the winners. Commiserations for the losers. For some, tears, heartache and a sense of failure.
Two very different approaches. Both missing the mark.
Life is competitive. We compete for school and university places, for jobs, for services, etc. Not everyone will get everything they want.
Private schools, which focus on creating future leaders, push their students hard to be life’s achievers. State schools seem content on producing tomorrow’s workers.
These ideas arise from fundamental concepts regards life that is held by secular societies. One such idea is that it is all about the individual and success is directly proportional to the effort put in. For instance, you are rich because you put the effort in and you are poor because you didn’t try hard enough. You win the race because you sacrificed more, you lost because you didn’t.
That is simply not true.
Success or failure can be linked to any number of factors often beyond the control of the individual. How many wealthy people are wealthy because they were supported by wealthy parents and had access to opportunity? How many times has success been achieved by being the right person, at the right place, at the right time- factors which were never planned? How much physical ability is due to genes and what Allah ﷻ has given?
Success is not in our hands. Success is in the hands of Allah ﷻ.
What is in our hands is the effort that we put in. So, we should put in the effort to be the best we can be with whatever ability Allah ﷻ has given us. In Islam we should seek ihsan/perfection in our actions. Obviously, effort should not be aimless, or half-hearted but directed at clear goals.
But if we don’t achieve the outcome then we take that in our stride. We are not disheartened. Instead, we know that this was not meant to be for us and learn from that. Allah ﷻ has other plans for us.
In every race there are winners and there are learners.
This is the correct attitude to life and one our children need to understand. If Allah ﷻ gives us success- then all praise and gratitude to Him. If Allah ﷻ chooses not to give success, then we cope with the setbacks, learn lessons, bounce back and keep trying.
Such an attitude also puts in perspective life’s real competition. The competition to gain Allah’s ﷻ pleasure and the delights of Jannah in the akhirah.
إِنَّ ٱلْأَبْرَارَ لَفِى نَعِيمٍ
عَلَى ٱلْأَرَآئِكِ يَنظُرُونَ
تَعْرِفُ فِى وُجُوهِهِمْ نَضْرَةَ ٱلنَّعِيمِ
يُسْقَوْنَ مِن رَّحِيقٍ مَّخْتُومٍ
خِتَـٰمُهُۥ مِسْكٌ ۚ وَفِى ذَٰلِكَ فَلْيَتَنَافَسِ ٱلْمُتَنَـٰفِسُونَ
‘Indeed, the righteous will be in pleasure. On adorned couches, observing. You will recognize in their faces the radiance of pleasure. They will be given to drink [pure] wine [which was] sealed. The last of it is musk. So for this let the competitors compete.’ (al-Mutaffifeen 22-26)
Related Articles
I place you in Allah’s trust
THE SUMMER HOLIDAYS are over. 6 weeks have passed by in the blink of an eye. My daughter returns to school today. It’s another milestone moment- the first day of secondary school. Schooling in the West has become increasingly difficult for Muslims and there certainly will be new challenges. I often wonder if I will […]
Palestine in UK schools: A listening hour
ARE YOU A teacher or parent facing pushback or silencing for raising the war in Gaza at school? Are you uncertain about how to introduce the topic into the classroom, or perhaps struggling to manage students’ conflicting views? Is your school failing to address issues of Islamophobia and antisemitism as a result? In this session, […]
Finer things
MY SON, LIKE many young boys his age, has a thing about cars, especially the fast and expensive type. I tend to downplay this as much as possible as I do not want him to have excessive love for the things of the dunya. It’s from early childhood that the likes and dislikes, the inclinations […]
